Monthly Archives: December 2012

A man parked his car at the supermarket and was walking past an empty cart when he heard a woman ask, "Excuse me, did you want that cart?"

"No," he answered. "I'm only after one thing."

As he walked toward the store, he heard her murmur, "Typical male."

A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it, and out popped a genie.

The genie said "You released me from the lamp, blah, blah, blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!"

The man sat and though about it for awhile and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick.

"Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"

The genie laughed and said,"That's impossible! Think of the logistics of that? How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete! How much steel! You're going to have to think of another wish."

The man agreed, and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment. I want to figure out why they're crying know what they really want when they say 'nothing', and know to make them truly happy."

The genie paused for awhile and said, "How many lanes do you want on that bridge?"