FINDING THE FUNNY - Spray Starch??

Grampa and Billy were working out in the garden. Grampa spies Billy trying to put a worm back into the ground.

"You'll never get that worm back in his hole," said the old man.

Suddenly, Billy had an idea. He ran into the laundry room and came back with a can of spray starch. After a few sprays, the worm was as stiff as a board and Billy was able to slide him back into the earth.

"Billy! You're a genius," exclaimed Granpa.

He hugged Billy, gave him a dollar out of his pocket, and ran inside.

Thirty minutes later, Grampa comes back out smiling. He gives Billy another dollar.

"Grampa," said the boy, "You already gave me a dollar."

"No," replied Grampa, "That dollar's from Grandma!"

FINDING THE FUNNY - Oh the Innocence!

A cop pulls over a carload of nuns.

Cop: Sister, this is a 65 MPH highway — why are you going so slow?

Sister: Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 22, not 65.

Cop: Oh Sister, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you're on!

Sister: Oh! Silly me! Thanks for letting me know. I'll be more careful.

At this point, the cop looks in the backseat where the other nuns are shaking and trembling.

Cop: Excuse me Sister, what's wrong with your friends back there?

Sister: Oh, we just got off of highway 119.

ARTICLE - Sexual Wellness as a Path to Freedom

 

Sexual Wellness as a Path to Freedom.
 
My hope is that this phrase will make you stop and think. Hmmm…how is this possible? 
 
How does a healthy sex life give you a feeling of freedom? 
 
First of all, let's define what is meant by sexual wellness or healthy sex. Sexual wellness is a return to the inner wisdom and truth about BEing a sexual person. It is a place that lives inside of you where you feel safe and have the power to enjoy sex without restraint, and have full permission to express your sexuality. This does not mean that you have to hang yourself upside down and create exotic gymnastics to have a fulfilling sexual experience. It actually has nothing to do with what is happening on the outside during sex. Sexual wellness is a quality of energy that pulses at a high vibration which results in vibrant health on the inside.
 
For every individual, the path to find sexual wellness is unique. No two orgasms look the same. You explore your personal inner most ecstatic feelings by allowing, receiving and surrendering to pleasure. Safety is the key.
 
Knowing you are safe is also an inside job. You experience safety when your body is very relaxed and your mind is easeful without stress and worries. How hard is this for you? According to current data, at least 60% of women are repressed sexually so I imagine many of you find it difficult to feel safe. BTW, the 60% statistic has also been noted to be low by many sexual experts. That's a WHOA Baby! 
 
It makes me sad to report it, as I know the value of sexual wellness for you, your relationships and the entire planet. When we free ourselves from the confinement of fear around our sexuality, the joy factor on the planet will increase substantially.
 
Let's take a look at our key words and their definitions, and how you can use the meaning behind them to skip down the path of sexual liberation and freedom. And please do skip…it gets us out of our serious minds…always helpful. :)
 
Allow: 1) to make a possibility, 2) to give consideration to circumstances or contingencies. 
 
Allow yourself to consider what needs to BE present in order to feel safe and experience pleasure. 
 
Receive: 1) to come into possession of, 2) to assimilate through the mind or senses
 
Receive and possess pleasure by experiencing joy through your senses. Let all your senses come alive throughout your day.
 
Surrender: 1) to give oneself over to something (as an influence), 2) to yield to the power
 
Surrender to the power of pleasure and allow it influence your life.
 
There are obvious issues which prevent us from experiencing deep satisfaction and fulfillment with sexuality. We, as women, are awfully good at complicating most situations. Our darn brains just don't want to turn off sometimes. 
 
Start where you are…and cultivate a knowing that sexual wellness heals you and creates freedom in every aspect of your life.
 
"Health is not only to be well, but to use well every power we have." - Florence Nightingale
 

FINDING THE FUNNY - Math Lesson

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read:

"Dear Wife,

You must realize that you are 54 years old and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight.

Your Husband"

When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows:

"Dear Husband,

You too are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18.

Don't wait up."

CBL#167 - Accepting our Inner Beauty and Sexuality leads to Love

"Life is not a problem to be solved, it is a mystery to be lived."

This quote was shared by my guest, Laura Maher, author of "Auntie Mom." Her book is a memoir of a year in her life where she raised her niece and nephew. It was an organic and orgasmic experience for her. Laura beautifully and vulnerably shares how she became more confident living in the mystery after this experience. To listen to her interview, and my memoir of how I found the path to "Living an Organic and Orgasmic Life," click the listen button below.

 

When her twenty-nine year old sister suffered a stroke, L.A. businesswoman Laura Maher returned home to Boston. During the year her sister spent in recovery, Laura moved her eight-year-old nephew and six-year-old niece to California. Because her fiancé did not want to “raise someone else’s kids”, their relationship ended, and as a result, she did not have a home for her or the kids to live in. While on a road-trip, Laura and the kids met a wealthy couple who invited them to live on their estate in the Santa Cruz Mountains.

Auntie Mom is an inspiring true story of a single woman’s yearlong adventure into motherhood. Laura weaves a rich tapestry of candid tales that speak to the heart of the age-old struggle every woman faces in her role as parent, in her search for self-identity. It’s a story of family, and faith, and the forgiveness that occurs when embracing the messy, complex situations we all find ourselves in when we step into the role of parent.

To learn more, go to www.auntiemombook.com

 

ARTICLE - Occupy Your Organic and Orgasmic Life

 

Photo credit to Pablo Solomon
www.pablosolomon.com

Occupying your organic and orgasmic life has a way of BEing good for the planet and sexy at the same time!!

 

 

My inspiration for this article came from a Google Alert on sexuality. What did we do before Google? In Auckland, New Zealand, there was a Sexuality and Consciousness Symposium in March, 2012. The aim of this event was to help people overcome guilt, shame and fear. The organizers wrote, "We are exploring the nature of healthy sexuality. The world is full of misinformation on who we are as sexual beings." How true this is!

One of the presenters, Baba Dez Nichols, expressed the following in defining healthy sex. "A healthy sense of sexuality is important because it allows us to be in control and occupy ourselves. Sex is our life force and when we are filled with guilt, shame and fear, which can hold us back, we have no power."

There are three things I love about this statement.

Sexuality…

1-allows us to occupy ourselves

2-is our life force

3-when repressed, strips our power

Let's look at these one at a time, beginning with number 3.

What happens when we repress our natural sexual feelings? Our bodies are more tense which depletes our energy. It takes energy to hold your muscles tense all day and night. When we do not have a healthy expression of our sexuality, we also anger and frustrate more easily. Anytime an emotion or feeling is repressed, bad things happen. I know this so well from personal experience with inflammation and pain throughout my body due to suppressed anger. Understanding and mastering my sexuality has not only given me relief from stress and tense muscles, but it has been an amazing form of healing as well. 

The National Institute of Health claims that 70% of our health issues are stress based. A healthy and satisfying sex life relieves stress and creates a natural harmony within your body. Sex is our life force. After all, other than a small percentage of mothers who were inseminated with sperm, most of us are walking around on the planet because somebody had sex. That is a pretty strong argument that sex is, indeed, our life force…without it, we would not even be here. I am certain mastering our sexuality can provide medicine that would most likely help the 70% of stress-based diseases.

Now, my favorite point from the New Zealander's point of view is that healthy sexuality allows us to occupy ourselves. I would say, it allows us to occupy our body instead of our mind with a pleasure surge that is good for us, our relationships and our planet.

My BEST strategy for occupying my body goes like this:

Breathe - deeply into the lower belly

Embrace - give myself a big hug

Smile - feel into my inner sexual sensation

Think - organic and orgasmic moment

The BEST strategy applies to any activity you may be engaging in…there is always a way to make it organic and orgasmic.

Apply the BEST strategy today, and let me know what how it feels to occupy your life by living in your magnificent body.

FINDING THE FUNNY - Whistling Doc

A new young MD doing his residency in OB was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams.

To cover his embarrassment he had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.

The middle-aged lady upon whom he was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassed him.

He looked up from his work and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?"

She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was, I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner."

CBL#166 = Streaming Love and Slow Sex with Christin Myrick

 

Occupy Your Body and discover the life force energy of sex to heal you, your relationships, and the planet!

This episode contains mature information about how to grow up, and become the beautiful sexual human BEing you already are. Yes, we make our way back to our true natures, and experience the vivid feelings of sensuality to create a healthy sexuality that has incredible potential for good in your life, your relationships, and the planet. Imagine a life where you felt full permission and freedom to express yourself in your FULL POWER. What would that open up for you? Listen in to the whole episode by clicking the button below.

Christin Myrick, Certified Slow Sex Coach, shares her beautiful insights about what men need from women in our world today. She writes, "Every man can be a warrior and king if you tell him what needs to be done AND give him the space to do it." Check it out, ladies!

 

Christin Myrick is a certified Slow Sex Coach with international clientele. She facilitates virtual and live training for good guys who want to be better men, and helps them to create deeper and more meaningful connections with women.

Men are beautiful creatures of great power, giving and strength and Christin has gained significant insight into what men desire and hold dear. It is her passion to share this wisdom with both men and women so we can live in a world of harmony and true compassion. 

Christin lives in the foothills of Boulder, loves poetry, whispering pines, and pink frosting.

 

To learn more, go to www.christinmyrick.com.